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Welcome to\u00a0<\/strong>How I Do It<\/a>, the series in which we give you a seven-day sneak peek into the\u00a0<\/strong>sex life<\/a>\u00a0of a stranger.<\/strong><\/p>\n This week we hear from Michelle*, a 29-year-old journalist who lives in\u00a0London<\/a>, and has been with her girlfriend, Iris*, for four years.<\/p>\n The pair met on Bumble a year after Michelle\u00a0came out<\/a>\u00a0to her loved ones.<\/p>\n \u2018I dated a few girls before her, but she\u2019s definitely my first serious girlfriend,\u2019 Michelle says. \u2018I hadn\u2019t kept my queer sexuality a secret really, but coming out was still such a relief. My family and friends were thankfully really supportive, and they all love Iris.\u2019b<\/p>\n They have\u00a0sex<\/a>\u00a0about four times a week on average, and Michelle finds their sex life \u2019empowering\u2019.<\/p>\n \u2018Having sex makes me feel more like myself than ever before, and not only do Iris and I have fun together, I really trust her,\u2019 she says.<\/p>\n \u2018But I\u2019d like our sex life to be more liberated. Between flatmates and staying at parents\u2019 houses we can\u2019t make noise, and our most fun sex has always been noisy.\u2019<\/p>\n So, without any further ado, here\u2019s how she got on over\u00a0Christmas<\/a>\u2026<\/p>\n Iris and I have come to say with my parents, as we\u2019re having a big family gathering later this week, a yearly tradition. Today we\u2019ve been doing lots of batch cooking, while also working from home, but Iris feels like she\u2019s coming down with an illness.<\/p>\n I\u2019m seeing my grandma later this week and so Iris is wary of making me sick. It\u2019s selfless of her, but I\u2019m a very tactile person and I really want to give her a kiss.<\/p>\n By the end of the day she feels much better and realises she was just tired, so she pulls me into the kitchen while everyone else is in the lounge and we share a kiss.<\/p>\n Being at my parents\u2019 house is a weird mixture of feelings \u2013 stolen kisses feel fun and taboo, but trying to have sex has been a bit less exciting \u2013 it\u2019s hard to get lost in the moment when you\u2019re staring up at your old\u00a0My Chemical Romance<\/a>\u00a0posters and trying to be as silent as possible.<\/p>\n We share some long kisses in bed tonight but we don\u2019t try to have sex. I\u2019m just too self-conscious with my parents one thin wall away. I wouldn\u2019t enjoy it.<\/p>\n There are people all over the house. The bathrooms are also in constant use, so even shower sex is out of the question.<\/p>\n Iris and I have been adventurous with sex before, so I suggest going on a walk to get out of the chaos. We find a quiet place in the park and manage a snog, but dog walkers spot us.<\/p>\n We could probably make it through a week without having sex at all, but neither of us want to go long without at\u00a0least\u00a0<\/em>kissing.<\/p>\n PDA in front of my parents makes me feel like spontaneously combusting with embarrassment, so finding a quiet spot together is a must \u2013 physical touch is my love language, and it makes me feel happy and wanted.<\/p>\n The kiss in the park is fun, but it makes us both feel a little frustrated as we can\u2019t find time alone to let it lead to more.<\/p>\n For the rest of the day we have family time eating and watching movies together \u2013 chastely holding hands under the blanket is about as steamy as things get.<\/p>\n I go for\u00a0drinks<\/a>\u00a0with some friends while Iris goes out separately with some of her friends. I get home feeling happy and tipsy, and I\u2019m pleased to see Iris is back.<\/p>\n My parents are already asleep so we can think about having a little intimacy, but I can\u2019t get over sex at home being such a turn-off; we can\u2019t be loud, we can\u2019t use any vibrating\u00a0toys<\/a>\u00a0(even the quiet ones emit a tell-tale buzzing), and my childhood bedroom is hardly a sexy environment.<\/p>\n Nevertheless, we kiss a little after whispering in bed, and Iris starts to finger me. I feel myself getting turned on and all of a sudden the awkwardness of being in my childhood bedroom melts away.<\/p>\n I turn to her and put my hand over her mouth while fingering her so she can\u2019t make any noise \u2013 the fact that she\u2019s trying so hard to be quiet while she orgasms is a huge turn-on, but it feels less like a good session and more like a build-up for when we get back to our own flat.<\/p>\n It\u2019s the day of the big family gathering, and it mostly revolves around food. After a huge breakfast together, closely followed by a huge lunch \u2014 and the entire family talking over one another \u2014 I\u2019m exhausted.<\/p>\n I\u2019m completely stuffed with food and booze, and I\u2019ve had a bit of a wobble. I\u2019ve been happily in recovery from anorexia for years and rarely feel awful about it anymore, but eating a lot with my family has knocked me back a little.<\/p>\n Eating around a lot of people can be triggering, but Iris supports me in small, thoughtful ways, like reading takeaway menus out loud to me so I don\u2019t have to read the calorie counts.<\/p>\n I cuddle up to Iris in bed and she can sense that my thoughts are racing with my old feelings about my body. She kisses me all over and touches the parts of my body I feel most insecure about; I love her for this.<\/p>\n She absolutely loves the way I look, even the bits I struggle to like about myself. It\u2019s made me feel much more confident, which in itself is such a turn-on.<\/p>\n The fact that she knows me so well, even my insecurities, does make our connection so much stronger. We don\u2019t have sex, but this moment feels even more intimate.<\/p>\n My parents and brother have gone out for a cold-water swim. This is my idea of hell, so me and Iris stay at home to make dinner for when they come back.<\/p>\n While my family are away freezing their toes off, we hop in the steamy shower together. There\u2019s nobody in the house, but it\u2019s quite small and the neighbours\u2019 houses are pressed close to ours, so I still feel a little self-conscious about making noise.<\/p>\n Iris touches me and soaps up my boobs and bum, but we don\u2019t have sex. The thought of my parents getting back early and hearing us is mortifying.<\/p>\n Still, looking at her naked body in the shower makes me look forward to heading back to our own flat in a few days\u2019 time.<\/p>\n I\u2019ve been seeing extended friends in\u00a0Manchester<\/a>\u00a0today and have come back to my parents\u2019 house absolutely exhausted, so anything resembling sex is off the cards tonight.<\/p>\n Iris and I have a peck and fall asleep for our last night here \u2013 we\u2019ll be going back to our flat early tomorrow morning.<\/p>\n My husband\u2019s raunchy Christmas gift reignited our sexual spark<\/a><\/p>\n Dirty hotel sex made up for this big disappointment after 10 years of marriage<\/a><\/p>\n My boyfriend\u2019s sex habit used to offend me \u2014 now I feel lucky<\/a><\/p>\n My husband has been practicing this sex technique for 30 years \u2014 he\u2019s a pro<\/a><\/p>\nMonday<\/h2>\n
Tuesday<\/h2>\n
Wednesday<\/h2>\n
Thursday<\/h2>\n
Friday<\/h2>\n
Saturday<\/h2>\n
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