{"id":4853,"date":"2026-01-22T08:44:31","date_gmt":"2026-01-22T08:44:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/badvibes.live\/?p=4853"},"modified":"2026-01-22T08:44:31","modified_gmt":"2026-01-22T08:44:31","slug":"a-blonde-nun-was-praying-in-her-room","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/badvibes.live\/?p=4853","title":{"rendered":"A blonde nun was praying in her room"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/header>\n
\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

A blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her,
\n\u201cMy daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love and your prayers are always for the benefit of others. I have come to commend you and to grant you anything you wish.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cOh, Father, I am perfectly happy. I do what I love. The Church supports me. I am content. I need nothing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cThere must be something you would like,\u201d said God.<\/p>\n

\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Well, there is one thing.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cName it,\u201d said God. She frowned.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s those blonde jokes. They\u2019re so demeaning, not just to me but to blondes everywhere. Can you stop them?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cConsider it done,\u201d said God.<\/p>\n

\u201cBlonde jokes are hereby stricken from the minds of humans everywhere. But isn\u2019t there something I could do just for you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, there\u2019s one thing. But it\u2019s really small and not worth Your time,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

\u201cTell me, please!\u201d said God.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s the M&M\u2019s,\u201d she said. \u201cThey\u2019re so hard to peel!\u201d<\/p>\n

================================
\nA little girl is sitting on her grandpa\u2019s lap and studying the wrinkles on his old face.
\nShe gets up the nerve to rub her fingers over the wrinkles.<\/p>\n

Then she touches her own face and looks more puzzled.<\/p>\n

Finally the little girl asks, \u201cGrandpa, did God make you?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHe sure did honey, a long time ago,\u201d replies her grandpa.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, did God make me?\u201d asks the little girl.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, He did, and that wasn\u2019t too long ago,\u201d answers her grandpa.<\/p>\n

\u201cBoy,\u201d says the little girl, \u201cHe\u2019s sure doing a lot better job these days isn\u2019t He?\u201d<\/p>\n

================================
\nA man is trying to understand the nature of God, time, and the Universe. He asks God,
\n\u201cHow long is a billion years to you?\u201d<\/p>\n

God says, \u201cA billion years is like a second to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

The man asks, \u201cWell, how much is a billion dollars to you?\u201d<\/p>\n

God says, \u201cA billion dollars is like a penny to me.\u201d<\/p>\n

So the man says, \u201cGod, can I have a penny?\u201d<\/p>\n

And God replies, \u201cIn a sec.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her, \u201cMy daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love and your prayers are always for the benefit of others. I have come to commend you and to grant you anything you wish.\u201d \u201cOh, Father, I am perfectly happy. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4854,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4853","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t